komodopiss (komodopiss) wrote in datinandrelatin,
komodopiss
komodopiss
datinandrelatin

How To Handle This...

Hey.

So, around 8 or so months ago, my best friend of 8 or 9 years confessd he was in love with me. I've never felt the same, so, I tell him so and try to have a conversation about it. I think it's fixed, though, there are, of course, wounds from doing such a thing. As time goes on, his attitude becomes more and more sour, his remarks becoming more and more insulting. I give it all a pass since he's undestandably upset and likely just not thinking. However, upon the 8th month mark, he says something that just pisses me off entirely too much and I tell him, "Hey, look, you can go if you want, but, regardless, I'm not having this conversation with you. You've been really rude for months now and maybe I should just give you your space." This was on the telephone - he doesn't reply to this, but simply he hangs up. I get even more pissed. Anyway, fast-forward a month and a half. We've not spoken since. I decide to contact him after some urging of one of my friends and I tell him something along the lines of, 'we should talk and i miss you,' and he replies promptly. With a funny photo and telling me how much it amuses him. Not even, 'hey, i missed you, too,' or 'hey, i haven't spoken to you in awhile,' or, 'i'm sorry i acted that way.' Just complete ignorance.

Am I wrong in wanting to push him down a flight of stairs?

I've discussed this with a few friends but they all seem to think I'm being a bit harsh, but, they're biased as fuck because they want me to have some 'true love/childhood friend' shit going on. And he's wealthy, so, they're tying to vicariously live through me and it's just pissing me off...

The thing is, I don't tell people I miss them. Ever. I've told him that maybe 3-4 times in 8 years. I've hugged him less than 10 times. I've never held his hand. I'm notoriously not affectionate, but, that's also because I don't feel that way towards him. He had the nerve to complain, during this 8-month period, that I don't 'show my emotions.' And that's true - I don't. But he doesn't get that, in his case, it's because I have none for him.

The way I see it is I simply massaged his ego by tellng him I missed him and he was eager to get 'back on track.' If he was anyone else, I'd simply tell him our friendship is over, but, he has been my friend for such a long time, I'm feeling so disgustingly sentimental about someone that seems more interested in their poor feelings than the reality of a sitaution.

I'd just like some second opinions. I know I can be harsh as hell and, quite honestly, his behavior has already made him much less important to me.  I don't know if I should pursue this 'friendship' because, in my opinion, he doesn't seem capable of 'letting it go.' I don't even think I should have to be 'forgiven,' yet he seems to think I owe him something or that he's justified in his reactions.
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